25
Apr
10

Tokyo Gore Police (2008)

Starring: Eihi Shiina, Itsuji Itao, Yukihide Benny

Writers: Kengo Kaji/Sayako Nakoshi

Director: Yoshihiro Nishimura

Here’s a brief list of things that I saw with my own eyes while watching Tokyo Gore Police:

  • Someone (actually many someones) getting chopped right in half.
  • A man grow guns for eyes when the top half of his head is ripped off (just the skin mind you)
  • A freak show where people were turned into oddities (we’re talking a girl becoming a legitimate SNAIL, bugged out eyes and all) and then others bid to have sex with them.

Any of these situations interest you? Then you’re gonna love the hell out of Tokyo Gore Police. It is a gory as hell ride through the bowels of a crazy Japanese man’s mind…and it…is…AWESOME.

The plot to Tokyo Gore Police absolutely does not matter in the slightest, but what the hell, let’s delve into it anyway: in future Tokyo, the police force has become privatized, owned by a corporation that is never mentioned by name. While that already sucks, there’s also a mad man known only as Key Man who is injecting weird key-shaped (the magic word here is “key”) tumors into people’s bodies which allows them to spurt weapons from wherever they may lose a body part. It also happens to drive people crazy and give them incredible bloodlust. These monstrosities are nicknamed “engineers” because they can engineer crazy stuff out of nothing (GET IT?!?). The TPC (Tokyo Police Corporation) have to deal with this on a very regular basis, but as luck would have it, they have an expert engineer hunter by the name of Ruka (Eihi Shiina).

Ruka is your usual sexy Japanese girl, but she loves splitting people in half with kitanas, cutting herself, and drinking at a local establishment known as “Bar Independent”. After the death of her father, she was raised by the Police Chief (Yukihide Benny) who has bred her into being the awesome slayer she is now. The plot follows Ruka on her quest to avenge her father’s death and she comes face to face with a bunch of crazy engineers. Chaos, blood, and minor plot stuff commence.

Got that? Good, now throw it out because it does not matter. It is just a flimsy piece of tape holding together a bunch of intensely gory action sequences. These action sequences, though, are some of the best I have seen. Japan does not hold back their blood; imagine the House of Blue Leaves fight in Kill Bill: Volume 1, but quadruple the blood and throw in weapons spawning from limbs. What is excellent about this is the fact that about 98% of it is done using legitimate non-CGI special effects (there are a few CGI shots here and there). It’s all costuming, makeup, weird appliances, and blood coming from various hoses. Hell, in a few scenes, you can see the hoses themselves, but you know what? Who cares! I don’t. You don’t. That guy doesn’t. I don’t again.

I am unable to tell if the acting was any good, but it seemed to serve its purpose. The world created in Tokyo Gore Police is derivative of Robocop; besides the private police force, there are little satirical commercials thrown in for good measure (one in particular concerns a brand of razor aimed at kids for the purpose of suicide…SUICIDE!) at random intervals. They also throw in a sexy Police Dispatcher, who randomly cuts in with cheerful remarks about the chaos and to send people to certain spots (reminiscent of the excellent Battle Royale film). In short, they didn’t break the bank when it came to originality in “future” Tokyo.

Still, it’s a riot to sit through. Just when you think you have seen everything, they up the ante. You start off raising your eyebrows, and you end by going “WHAT THE #*$&#*$#($ WAS THAT?!?”, and even laughing at the absurdity of it. At least I did. You will too, I believe in you.

Tokyo Gore Police is 100 minutes of non-stop violence and chaos. It makes little to no sense, there’s no real plot developments (or even a plot), and you’ll probably scream and holler and be in complete shock at the crazy stuff the filmmakers come up with. Still, it’s a fun ride and if you like over the top violence this is definitely worth a watch. Hell, even if you don’t like stuff like this, you should still at least watch the opening scene; this is something you need to see to believe.

Final Verdict:

4/5

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